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My personal pursuit of masculinity has led me down various paths. Some very dark indeed, some full of light, love, and hope for self and others, and a deep respect for this world we live in today.

Despite our best efforts to resist it, many of us have been shaped - and scarred - by the legacy of dysfunctional masculinity. All men carry traces of this inheritance. In ways seen and unseen, we’ve been both wounded by it and, at times, complicit in passing it on.

On some level we’re all traversing tender, wounded parts. Let’s meet there and deepen our relationships, lessening the burden for our children and future generations.

Here 's what I don't like about the term "people-pleasing" : it is inherently shaming.

And the Grandmothers sang to me, "If Love is a River, Listen".

"A society grows great when old men plant trees, the shade of which they will never sit in" (from Afterlife)

Getting Real is a way of becoming the change. A dynamic meditation, a reweaving of connections, we can take anywhere, while doing anything.

The circle of shame, really, is just a fire that burns up the shame altogether.

Allowing things to take their time

When we point at what we love, it is a way of knowing what it is we can or do love of ourselves.

Where are our Elders? The wise, calm, benevolent ones that help us feel safe in the world.